STRIPPERS…………… of Life. Part 2

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Happy new month loves……May this half of the year be wayyyyy better than the previous in Jesus’ name. Amen. I know that you have been waiting for the end of yesterday’s post so let me just give it to you. You can read the beginning of this post here

At first, I hesitated and then I was like ok, bring it on (how can I go to a strip club without getting a lap dance, it’s like soaking garri without salt or sugar). So I picked a girl and he went to do the needful (God bless Stella Oduah for that phrase). Curiosity they say kills the cat and it actually killed mine.

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The girl comes around, ‘lil’ chit chat, then bam, she starts dancing. It was pretty erotic, but then the irony of my night just began. She started by doing a little striptease, she was on bum shots and a bra, then she starts dancing to sekem, oh my!!! To see such an ASS-et at point blank range, was discomforting (but I held my composure like a boss, spreading like Rick Ross, papas’ thangs).


After the booty display, next comes a full frontal display of the smallest breasts I have ever laid my eyes on! I was utterly flummoxed and dismayed to say the least (I’m a boobs man, at least you can understand where I’m coming from). Oh well, I had to make do with what was available after all as the saying goes, a bird (breast) in hand na im dey hand, leave the one wey dey bush! She then strips her bum shots to reveal a very tiny thong so tiny that you would have to separate both butt cheeks to reveal it. She then does her stuff, there was no pole for her to swingwirl, mine wasn’t available; its network was temporarily busy!

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Well, like you see in the movies, I thought that was where it was going to end, you can imagine my surprise when she then pulled her thong! Now, I got uncomfortable!! Everything was in display, I mean everything. Then she got on me, whining to Timaya’s shake your bum bum, on my laps! Hmmm. I was just there smacking the ass right there like a ‘bawse’. Then she does a 180 on me, how she did it, i don’t know, all I remember was actually seeing some labia majora. Now I was a bit disgusted! I just sat there waiting for her to finish her routine and go, which eventually happened.

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I didn’t quite enjoy the dance, not necessarily cos of her small minus A cup miniature breasts or her beautiful ASS-et or her fake eyelashes (which I found and still find very repugnant, generally) or her labia majora, but because I was not just feeling it due to the fact that I had a total nude stranger dancing in front of me, and then I became philosophical, pondering on what would have made her to get involved in this. Strange, right? You go fear my naked inspiration na! I actually envisioned this act to be one of intimacy shared by lovers, which was my mind-set. So having the dance with a complete stranger, I discovered was a turn off for me. It dawned on me that Keffi (for that was the name she told me) was a hustler, using what she had to get what she needed (or wanted?). The club was her avenue to express herself how best she knew, with the way she danced, you would know it meant nothing to her only business as usual, her face, expressionless while it lasted, which only further put me off.

With everything that transpired that night, it dawned on me that in life we might all just be strippers in our own way. Hanging on to the pole of life, trying to make our situations better. Trying to get the best out of whatever situation we may find ourselves in, strutting our stuff for us to be acknowledged and accepted. Like they say we may never know what we are capable of, unless our backs are against the wall. I do not find what Keffi does condemnable, albeit morally unjustified. Scenarios such as bank managers telling their female marketing staff to do ‘the needful’ when forced to meet impossible targets, or ‘Mr Lecturer’ situations, are not only condemnable, but are morally unjustifiable.

We may be doing it with a smile on our faces or just a blank expression. Our dignities and integrities may be on the line. If the lines are crossed, I guess we have ourselves to blame. In the end nobody really cares what you did and how you did it as long as you can deliver. All we have is our conscience to guide and judge us.

Well, by the time I left, I was partially fulfilled, I got home, undressed, had my bath and soaked my clothes and slept peacefully!!!

The end!!

Fact: “There’s a very thin line between a stripper and a prostitute and its thinner than a G-string” Xavian

Written by @iam_xavian

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About the author / 

Patrick Jennifer

My name is Patrick Jennifer............ Talkative extraordinaire (aspiring OAP), Professional 'carer', Wanna-be writer, and I am sweetness personified.

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  1. July 10, 2014 at 4:06 pm -  Reply

    Nice,,,,,,,,,,, keep it up

  2. oluSunYAh July 4, 2014 at 4:07 pm -  Reply

    Nice one, we are all strippers in our own world, doing our shitty shits……

    • shughar July 5, 2014 at 12:25 pm -  Reply

      hmmm….. are we now?

      • oluSunYAh July 7, 2014 at 6:49 am -  Reply

        Sure, some of us just like the pretense part more than the real world.

        • shughar July 9, 2014 at 8:02 am -  Reply

          hmmmmmmm. i agree with you on that

  3. jhacquey July 4, 2014 at 7:36 am -  Reply

    Nice moral. Naija strip clubs r actually disgustin bydway. Lol

    • shughar July 4, 2014 at 4:22 pm -  Reply

      veryyyyyy very. lol…..thanks for commenting

  4. chiboy July 2, 2014 at 8:05 am -  Reply

    Nice endin bt u shud hv bleached your clothes, just kiddin doh, d truth is @ d end of d day no matter were we find ourselves or wat we engage in its as a result of choices we made in d pass, so before u make a decision 2day think abt it carefully…

    • shughar July 4, 2014 at 4:22 pm -  Reply


  5. Anonymous July 1, 2014 at 4:28 pm -  Reply

    Vewi true, at d end ur integrity nd dignity matas.

    • shughar July 1, 2014 at 5:00 pm -  Reply

      yes. they do…….. very much so, actually.

  6. theshaione July 1, 2014 at 12:51 pm -  Reply

    Anti -climax o!!! Ok, I expected something else at d end other than the proselytising and moralising stuff. Nevertheless, the message is clear and properly delivered. Although, I find it hard to believe that the author slept sound after all that….adventure.

    • shughar July 1, 2014 at 1:51 pm -  Reply

      hahahahahahaha! Issokay ….. Kpele. Thank you

  7. Anonymous July 1, 2014 at 12:44 pm -  Reply

    A very good analysis of what goes on in a strip club…..and youa re not alone in those thoughts!

    • shughar July 1, 2014 at 1:48 pm -  Reply

      aha! Someone is with us too. lol

  8. elsieisy July 1, 2014 at 11:31 am -  Reply

    i love the way it ended. saint and sinners. we all are both

    • shughar July 1, 2014 at 1:49 pm -  Reply


  9. femi July 1, 2014 at 11:21 am -  Reply


  10. arnytah July 1, 2014 at 11:21 am -  Reply

    Nice…I like d fact at d end

    • shughar July 1, 2014 at 1:54 pm -  Reply

      yeah….. me too

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