Relationship, Shughar Talks (Audio Posts)

Audio Post: When is it too much?

10 12

Hey love,
How far? It is a cold morning and I am here with my talky talk self! I hope you are warm, we don’t want you to fall ill. :) A friend of mine said that mb’s are very precious to us in Nigeria (veryyyy true) and I am glad that you are using yours on this site….God bless you. No too much writing today, I am talking about something that I (and many others) need answers to.

Please, listen and share your views. Thank you

PS- If there is anything you want me to talk about, kindly let me know and I will do my best on the topic. Also, if you want to be heard, kindly send your audio post(in mp3 format) to Please make it short and functional. Thanks :*

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About the author / 

Patrick Jennifer

My name is Patrick Jennifer............ Talkative extraordinaire (aspiring OAP), Professional 'carer', Wanna-be writer, and I am sweetness personified.

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  1. Beekay July 1, 2014 at 1:22 pm -  Reply

    Ok. I find this particularly interesting because I have been and am still in this kind of situation. Frankly, it depends on the people involved. There is no need to make people do the things they don’t want to do, you only end up making things complicated.

    In my relationships, I do the calling when I think it’s necessary and I expect my partner to do same. It’s often a litmus test to show how involved and committed we both are. When the calls are not coming, it’s not usually a good sign. And when it’s too much, i personally find it disturbing….everyone deserves their space sometimes

    Well done Shughar!

    • shughar July 1, 2014 at 1:38 pm -  Reply

      Thank you beekay :)

  2. elsie June 27, 2014 at 7:13 am -  Reply

    if you are my boyfriend, assiiin i finally accept you to be my boyfriend, then u have to call me atleast twice a day o. i dont have to spell that out. but then, dont choke me. dont start asking me what and what i am doing at every given time. plsss. that is just annoying, there is a thin line between caring and choking.
    then if its just fwb, it all depends, u dont necessarily need to call me daily, but like i said, it depends on how the parade goes.

    • shughar June 27, 2014 at 9:12 am -  Reply

      hahahaha. this is a clear case of ‘to whom much is given, much is expected’. lol
      lmao @how the parade goes! na to dey sign agreement ni yen o. Thank u dear

  3. Engee Nsofor June 25, 2014 at 9:48 pm -  Reply

    I agree wit u shughar. It means u av d person’s ‘time’ wch to me translates dat d person is so impt to u dat u not only remembered dis person, but went thru d stress of picking up ur fone, n d sacrifice of using precious crdt just to talk to dis person.
    From experience, I feel dat someone who wud complain dat it is too much, weda in a relatnship or frndship is someone who doesn’t care so much abt u, i.e doesn’t av ur own time. I av a frnd who wud call me evrytime to tell me dat he just ate beans and it was sweet or sometin similarly silly, everytime he calls o. But I always gladly take his calls bcos he is impt to me. I have his time.
    Wen 2 pple love n really care abt each oda, der will be no fear of it bcoming too much as dey r bth comfortable n confident of d fact dat dey r impt to each other n wud always have each other’s ‘time’. Saying I don’t want to call too much so he/she doesn’t think I love blah blah blah… To me, this just shows insecurities and pride too.
    Pple make not talking in a day a big deal probably bcos evryone wants to be comfortable in a relatnship. U want to knw dat ur swthrt is thinking abt u n wud make d effort to talk to u no matter wat, evn if it is once in a day.
    To me, one can only cross d line if u let insecurities control ur ‘stalking’. It wud always show n twud be annoying to d oda person, but we shd also try n give our significant oda no reason to be insecure in d first place.
    In conclusn, d answer is neva. Why shd it be too much if I miss u or I want to hear ur voice or I want to knw how ur doing n I call? Wat if I actually missed u 10 times dat day nko? Lol. Anyway, I’m not being conclusive. Just my own tots on d issue.

    • shughar June 26, 2014 at 10:43 am -  Reply

      Gbamset! A romantic like me 😀 …….. these are my beliefs too but some people no dey gree o, To them it is disturbance.
      Thank you for commenting, my darling………….. let’s keep calling and texting and disturbing those that we love. lol

  4. fragiletimbz2013 June 25, 2014 at 12:55 pm -  Reply

    It becomes too much when it leaves the position of love and drifts towards obsession.. There should be an ‘understanding’ in a relationship. Can love be too much? No! But obsession can ruin the purpose of love.. Plenty sex or minimal sex, I think one should maintain the thing line between inadequate and extremity/excesses, which is moderacy. When it is too much, you will get the signs. Don’t quit, just slow down… Everybody loves being loved….

    • shughar June 25, 2014 at 1:20 pm -  Reply

      hmmmm… I think understanding is key….. they should probably talk about it before they start dating sef. lol

  5. Nwachukwu X Idemili June 25, 2014 at 12:07 pm -  Reply

    It becomes too much when both parties have engaged in frequent sexual intercourse that doesn’t involve coitus interruptus
    It becomes moderate when both parties have engaged in minimal sexual intercourse involving coitus interruptus
    It becomes less when both parties engage in foreplay!!
    Dr Nwax says so viia Nokia 101

    • shughar June 25, 2014 at 12:37 pm -  Reply

      Not sure how this answers my question, biko. …… I asked when ‘correspondence becomes too much’, not what makes it become much. Thank you

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